Whores in Church
In Remembrance of Cecilia Gentili, 1972-2024
Above: Cecilia Gentili photographed by Oscar Diaz. Source: Cecilia Gentili Opens Her Burn Book
I grew up in the American Midwest and South, were folksy language is an art form. The phrase “sweating like a whore in church” was often used to suggest that a person was so nervous about something they were hiding that they were sweating. At the moment, it seems to be the church itself that’s sweating, over having “accidentally” allowed the celebration of a whore into their sacred space.
Cecilia Gentili was, at 52, already a legend in the world of the sex workers’ rights movement and was at the center of the trans rights movement in New York. She was also an actress, known for her appearances on the show Pose. She lived in service to sex workers, trans people, and people of color, all of which she was. She was known as someone who always showed up for her people, whether it was to help someone find housing and food or to speak at a rally. She was an icon and a mother in her community, and received many community awards. Though I was not part of her close circle, I am blessed to have seen and heard her speak. I believe that she knew her legacy of glamour, resilience, love, and service would persist.
When she passed away on February 6 her community banded together to celebrate her life. A service was held at Judson Memorial Church on February 7, and reportedly over a thousand people showed up to share their senses of loss and their stories of her.
A video from the service at Judson:
Judson has long been an ally of the sex workers’ rights movement; when I was a member of Prostitutes of New York (PONY) in the early 2000s, we would meet there. Candida Royalle’s funeral was held there. There is an annual historic vigil there every December 17 to honor sex workers who’ve died in the course of the year. Judson is a true ally to sex workers, providing community space and other forms of support, sometimes in the face of fundamentalist so-called christian outrage. It seemed logical to me that her memorial would be there, and I was sad to be out of town for it. I was not part of her world, but I am a whore and our worlds overlap, and I wanted to honor her. Cecilia is considered by many to be a spiritual mother, and Judson is a space that honors chosen family.
https://decriminalizesex.work/international-day-to-end-violence-against-sex-workers/
There are precedents for churches as safe spaces for sex workers. These extend back for centuries (and that’s without talking about the ancient practice of temple prostitution). The most famous contemporary example is the occupation of Saint-Nizier Church in Lyons, France in June 1975 https://www.nytimes.com/1975/06/07/archives/200-prostitutes-of-lyons-in-siege-at-church.html , when over 200 prostitutes took over the sacristy to protest repression by the police. They stated their goal clearly: they wanted to be heard by the highest authorities, and they wanted fellow workers who had recently been imprisoned to be released. At that time, in their region, prostitution was legal, but being a client of a prostitute or living off the proceeds of prostitution was not (a model similar to the dreaded Nordic Model (https://www.swarmcollective.org/blog/the-swedish-model), which effectively made the work illegal. The workers occupying the church described how the law affected them, leading to police harassment and other dangers to themselves and their families. The occupation made worldwide news, and had an effect on public understanding of sworkers in their varied circumstances. In honor of their determination and courage, June 2 is now recognized around the world as International Whores Day. https://www.internationalwhoresday.com/history
Another memorial was held for Cecilia Gentili at St Patrick’s Cathedral on Fifth Avenue in NYC on February 15. When we heard the announcement, my friends and I who had for decades been sex worker activists – or tangential to the movement – were in gleeful awe. Again, I was out of town, but I felt such a sense of joy to imagine her celebration of life rising into that high ceiling.
Cecilia’s solo show https://playbill.com/article/cecilia-gentillis-red-ink-will-make-off-broadway-debut-this-fall explored “finding faith as a transwoman,” and I was looking forward to seeing it. The bible roundly thumped me as a kid, and if an uber-privileged ciswoman like me was tortured by finding faith as a queer youth, I imagine the scale of Cecilia’s exploration, as well as the depth and breadth of her heart and spirit, made for a devastating story. The thought of her being honored in such a famous church felt like a blast of progress – for the church, as well as for the recognition of the humanity of trans sex workers of color. My friends and I talked about how, even in all our privilege, we never imagined such a thing could happen in our lifetimes. But it did, and it was glorious, and you can watch it here:
Now the archdiocese is saying they were misled and that the service was sacrilegious, and they went so far as to perform a mass of reparation to atone for having allowed people to celebrate this person in the ways she would have loved to be celebrated. Some of the things that happened during the service were things that some Catholics have been offended by – things that pertain to the ways marginalized people are kept in their places for the benefit of those who are not marginalized in the same ways. A spiritual practice has to be more than an assimilation into the fundamentals of a privileged and wealthy church system; it should be a creative, explorative, community-based journey designed to make the world a better place for all. Strict adherence to “sacred” norms is not a spiritual practice, it’s a superstitious practice. Let people be holy in their own ways.
In my opinion, the church’s claim of being deceived is simply a statement that trans people and sex workers should not have been made welcome there, and I’m ashamed for the people making that assertion. What would Jesus do? What would Pope Francis do? Why, PF would call for the inclusion of transgender people in the practices of the Catholic church, as he did just last year. https://glaad.org/pope-francis-calls-for-the-inclusion-of-trans-people-in-catholic-practices/
Ceyenne Doroshow, an icon in her own right as founder and executive director of Glits Inc https://www.glitsinc.org/executivedirector , says plainly that when she contacted the church about holding the service there she did not mislead them, and she had suggested they google Cecilia to have an understanding of her. It’s obvious that this would have been easy to do. How can there be any intended deception when the person’s name is given, and a simple research of that name would have provided everything?
A church is meant to be a place of protection and salvation. If a god wanted these people struck down, that god had plenty of time to do it. The church is not a god. It is made holy by the people who occupy it, always.
Cecilia Gentili founded COIN, a free health services program for sworkers. Isn’t that holy?
She fought for anti-discrimination legislation. Isn’t that holy?
She talked publicly about her religious conflicts and her spiritual quests. Isn’t that holy? Isn’t that what spiritual leaders do?
It’s worth wondering why these spaces deserve the awe they often receive (and their tax-exempt status). I live in New York City, and I often go into to churches to rest during a long walk, meditate, and enjoy the architecture. I’m pagan now (and maybe always was), as I was driven to self-harm by the thumping I experienced as a kid; in order to survive, thrive, and give back to the world, I prefer to spend as little time relying on that book as possible. I’ve prioritized the earth and the people around me who actually exist and our mutual responsibilities, rather trying to placate than a punishing daddy in the sky. All of us sex workers and queers manage our relationships with religion and spirituality, while we balance our need for guidance against the manipulation of mythologies that are distorted in order to harm us.
Let me tell you, I don’t sweat in church at all.
I wasn’t sure it was my place to write this post, as I’m not in Cecilia’s “demographic,” but those demographics are imposed from the outside, and I don’t want to impose them from the inside as well. I feel her in my heart and I see all the blessings she bestowed in her lifetime. Long may the legacy of Cecilia reign, to serve and inspire her fans, friends, and family, and long may those who are offended by her be the ones who perspire about it.
More:
Cecilia’s passing recognized in Vogue
This amazing article on Linked-In is worth reading: an anti-trafficking activist acknowledges how a conversation with Cecilia helped her understand how excluding sex workers’ rights activists from anti-trafficking conversations could be doing harm (sex workers’ rights activism is inherently anti-trafficking, BTW; abolitonists’ real objection to swra is that it’s not inherently anti-sex-work).
Article with beautiful photos: